During David Cameron’s PMQs yesterday it emerged opposition leader Ed Miliband has a rare condition where he has no memory of the 13 years that his party were in power.

PM Cameron and Labour leader Ed Miliband were debating the banking crisis and the fallout of the HSBC investigation that found the bank to have encouraged their customers to use Tax avoidance loopholes. Miliband bit at the PM saying “what are you going to do about big business avoiding their national responsibility”?, Cameron then decided to go on the offence saying “do you not remember the 13 years your government had to legislate against this behaviour?

Miliband then shocked Westminster by responding ” what 13 years?, I have no recollection of ever being in government,  I don’t believe you.

This is just another example of Miliband being an unworthy rival to Cameron, Miliband is bottom of the opinion polls which is suicide for Labour so close to an election. This is just another setback for the creepy Aardman like character who is more unsettling on the eye than seeing Dawn French nude.

A Labour peer Dave Jones took a few minutes to give his opinion “I think this has all been blown out of proportion, of course we made some mistakes during those 13 years, however I feel you are missing the point. We are not in power so it is not our problem.

A survey recently carried out saw Miliband’s popularity somewhere between Katie Hopkins and that annoying turd that you can’t quite scrape from your boot.

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Marvel Entertainment have had a sensational last few years which started with the release of Iron Man starring Robert Downey Jnr and followed up with 2 sequels which were followed up by Hulk, Capt. America and Thor films not to mention the Avengers and soon Avengers Age Of Ultron, it has been a massive turn around in their fortunes for a company that found themselves on the edge of extinction.

Now it appears they are channeling their focus on one of their present characters, Nick Fury who started off as white and was played by “actor” David Hasselhoff was then changed to be “more ethnic” and played by Samuel L Jackson is set to revert back to his initial appearance.

Hollywood reporter caught up with Hasselhoff on the set of his new film “Spandex warriors”.

” I really enjoyed Nick Fury Agent of S.H.I.E.L.D I have no idea why it bombed so badly, what was not to like?”

The Hoff continue “I expect there to be lots of lycra, I envisage the appearance to be somewhere between Baywatch and The Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert, To say I am very excited would be a huge understatement”.

Civil war hits cinemas in 2016.

It has emerged that Prince Charles has been advised to consider ear reduction surgery due to them interfering with Satellite signals. 

The well travelled Prince first encountered this issue when boarding a plane last year at Heathrow where it is thought that his “jug-eared” appearance had caused air traffic control to sound out a red alert due to a system malfunction.

A member of air traffic control at Heathrow Harry Smith said ” I think it is for the safety of other passenger that he should seriously consider the surgery, at present he is a serious flight risk for himself and other passengers”.

It is unclear as to how he will proceed with this health issue, needless to say fellow travellers will be hoping for a resolution soon.

With this season rapidly coming to an end, I thought I would take this time to outline three players that I feel would add a lot to the Arsenal squad and make them a whole lot more competitive for next season, these are not necesarily players that Arsenal have been linked with but I would have to say these are players that Wenger should be seriously considering and they are also very realistic options.  

MATS HUMMELS

 

 

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The 6ft 3 German Centre Back who is currently playing for Dortmund in the Bundesliga would be a great acquisition for any club in the world, He is strong, good in the air, can read the game very well has a good turn of pace,  and is very useful in both penalty areas, Unfortunately due to the impending sale of Mario Gotze to rivals Bayern Munich there is no real need to sell but it would be wise to test their resolve for the highly rated 24 year old.

CHRISTIAN ERIKSEN

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Eriksen who currently plays his football for Ajax who seems to have been around for years now is still only 21 years old, the Dane has been capped 34 times for his country, he is a very similar player to Andres Iniesta and would improve Arsenal’s attacking options considerably a bid in the region of £20 million is believed to be required for his signature, In my view he would be worth every penny. 

 

MICHEL VORM

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Arsenal have struggled  defensively for most of the campaign this could be attributed to in some quarters the goalkeeping personnel at the club Fabianski and Szczesny both have doubts in respect of being a good enough number 1. Michel Vorm would be a perfect choice, he is the right age at 29 has good experience now with two very reliable seasons in the premier league at Swansea and would be a great addition to the squad, He is also been capped nine times for the Netherlands. Vorm also has the most clean sheets in the league this season with seven. He would be a steal at the price of around £10 million.

Another Important Three Points for the Arsenal - FTBpro lineup

Its another Saturday which means its another must win game, a needed 3 points for the Arsenal as they entertain Norwich. A win will see them climb to third place which they would hold at least until Wednesday when Chelsea travel to Fulham. This would definitely cement the push for a top four place. With Arsenal having what some pundits have called “the easier run in” out  of the 4 teams that are competing for third and fourth place with. 

Goalkeeper

 

I do not see any need to change things, Fabianski has definitely showed a dramatic change of form in the last 3 games. He still has his unsettling moments but given a choice between him and Szczesny I would stick with Lukasz at the moment, he has earned his place.

 

Defence

 

Sagna: Although I am a keen admirer of Carl Jenkinson, Sagna is still the first choice RB at the club more due to his experience than anything else.

Koscielny: I still believe is our best Central Defender, he has got a lot stronger since his first season, He has good awareness he is quick and wins a lot in the air these days, one of the most improved players in the league last season and he seems to build on that as his time at the club progresses.

Vermaelen: Is expected to come back into the fold, with Mertesacker suspended. Arsene Wenger has praised his attitude since being dropped from the 11, It is now time to answer critics.

Monreal: I am surprised how quick he has settled, I have been very impressed with his performances, Not sure its a coincidence we have looked better defensively since his arrival. although he was to blame for Readings consolation goal in our last home game he has not done much else wrong.

 

Midfield

 

Arteta: Arteta i am sure will start once more screening the back four, he has done another fine job for us there this season, not really a job he is used to but he impresses me a lot with every game. 

Wilshere: I am glad to see Jack back in the squad he is always a big miss whenever he is absent. Look forward to seeing him link up with the likes of Arteta and espeically Santi they have developed a very good understanding in the final third.

Walcott: Theo should also be fit I would start him as well, we have lacked a bit of pace recently on the wings, he had been off the boil previous to his injury but there have been positive comments coming out of Colney regarding this traning and memebers of staff thoroughly think he could well be close to being back to his best.

Cazorla: The little magician never fails to impress me, One of the signings of then season an absolute bargain, hoping he is asked to operate just behind Giroud today, I feel he is wasted out on the left wing, he is far more dangerous just off the Striker.

Oxlade-Chamberlain: I think Ox has been more than unfortunate not to be a first team regular this season, he always looks lively, full of energy he gives his all and has a few tricks too. It is high time he was given a run of game to show the league what he is made of.

 

Forwards

Giroud

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Giroud

 

I am not too sure we have much else to choose from up front than Olivier, athough he now looks more like the player I thought we were signing compared to the “out of his depth” striker that we saw earlier on in the season. He has a very good goal tally this season better than most, although this doesn’t seem to stop what I feel very unfair criticism.  He has 16 goals in all competitions this season which isn’t a bad return for his first season at the club. 

 

He is very powerful, sometimes I do not feel we play to his strengths. Thoroughly expect him to start and bag a couple today.

 

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This is definitely the approach I would take for todays game, Press high up the pitch and attack down the flanks, give Giroud some good service and I think we should see a well earned three points by 16.45.

 

Feedback always welcome

Goonerscribe

 

Follow me on twitter @goonerscribe

 

  Mikel Arteta of Arsenal scores their fourth goal from the penalty spot during the Barclays Premier League match between Arsenal and Reading at Emirates Stadium on March 30, 2013 in London, England

 

With our very recent change in fortunes I was looking very much forward to the visit of Reading, I didn’t think it was going to be as one sided as it turned out.  at one stage of the first half we actually had 95% of possession, although as impressed as I was I cannot help but think this is just another game that will once more paper over the cracks. the very limited amount of times we were put under pressure we were yet again very unconvincing. The reading goal was of poor Sunday League defending standard. Thankfully Santi Cazorla was on hand to pretty much single handed secure us three points. 

 

Not for the first time this season I found myself incredibly disgruntled at Arsene Wenger‘s team selection. No problem with Fabianski and the back four as they have been steady-ish in the last few games. its ahead of them that I have the problem. Cazorla who was yet again impressive and played out of position. He needs to play just off the front to effect the game to his maximum potential. Gervinho ( I know he opened the scoring and was involved in two other goals) instead of Oxlade-Chamberlain, this decision baffles me. What does he have to do to get a start these days. started against swansea and was impressive then gets dropped. 

 

I would have had Oxlade-Chamberlain right, and Podolski left with Santi just behind Giroud. Finishing the midfield off with Arteta and Ramsey in the central roles. 

 

Nevertheless a well earned three points but I would be very nervous of us putting the same team out against stronger opposition.

 

Feedback Welcome

 

Goonerscribe

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